never forget...xo

about this time last year...he came home from school excited...it was the day his class got to shop at the holiday market...one of the those elementary school things that i had totally forgotten about, but now, thanks to him, can remember vividly. (...the tables covered in little boxes of "gifts" being not too far above eye level, walking between them checking out all of the options...holding a little change purse in my hands....wondering what to pick...no one there to help talk me out of something or change my mind for me...important decisions to make all on my own)...he ran into the bedroom, the baby was nursing/sleeping in my arms...he whispered in my ear so that she couldn't overhear..."i got something for the baby today...for christmas...it's a bracelet and it's gold (really stressed this)...what's that one that metal colored?" "silver?", i replied..."yeah, silver...it's silver and gold!"  and, yes, it was silver & gold & the most perfectly baby sized bracelet i ever did see...a perfect choice for his sister's first christmas...all on his own.

meet aleggandria...who, for the past two plus decades, has been living quietly tucked away inside a bin marked "elementary school, high school and college", along with my rubber madonna style bracelets & cross necklaces, my retainer & a swatch watch, my high school track medals & old love letters sent by my future husband...all things that at some point or another i felt were very important and should be saved.   did i mention she was in perfect condition?

in 8th grade i, along with my assigned husband troy, had to care for her for a week or two or maybe even longer, i can't remember,  we had to carry her everywhere, documenting her travels and hoping she did not break...she survived and got us an A...teaching us a lesson in responsibility and teamwork...

when the project was over, i couldn't bear to crack her, so my mom helped me blow out the yolk to preserve her...forever....

until last week, when we decided to rummage through some bins and my light saber wielding six year old accidentally knocked her loop...my first reaction as she flew through the air was to yell about how long i have had her and about being more careful, blah, blah, blah...and then i saw the look on his face...and aleggandria taught me another lesson...of letting go and that one way or another, eggs are meant to be broken.

we visited "our" park in the hours before hurricane irene came to town...it was quiet and so were we...we observed the stream and its water level...we listened to wind just begining to pick up...we started running home as the first few drops began to fall...

i gasped a little when i saw this dress tucked deep in a rack at an antique shop...pregnant at the time, i knew right away i would display it in my little girl's room...i imagine her wearing this dress in a few years over something very modern and black...with boots, i think...i wonder if she will refuse because it is old and worn or if instead she will remember it hanging there next to her crib and think, when she tries it on, how cool it is that she is wearing art...

on the way out, the trip took us through five states...this part is one of my favorites...feeling like you can see forever...letting the car coast down the mountain...breathing in the beauty that is all around you...maybe it's because now i am a parent myself, but for the first time, i found myself wondering how my parents let the twenty year old me make this ten hour trip...alone...without a cell phone...more than once or twice... hoping one day i will have that kind of faith to let go and know that all will be well and feeling so, so glad they did.

streets lined in brick over one hundred years ago...how much time has changed...how much they have witnessed...how many memories come back...of living on my own, of choosing a path...of falling in love...

he walked down the aisle at his auntie's wedding in these...his first time in a tux...he stomped in puddles before the night was over...he took them off as fast as he could so he could run barefoot in the sand on his way to the gulf...they have been to savannah and to nyc...through the trails in our park & into the stream....he peddled his first big boy bike in them...tried to climb trees & picked flowers at the farm in them..he wore them to meet his little sister & when he rode the bus for the first time to kindergarten orientation, but when he saw them on the porch yesterday, he held them up & said " hey look! it's my wedding shoes!"